This week I added another year to my stay on earth. It has been a nice fifty-six years walking around here, hanging out with God and his cool creation. With further reflection, however, I realize that I have spent far too much time worrying about the journey.
A year ago I was living out my car from vacation rental to vacation rental in the southwest United States. I was on a road trip with no place to call home. Today, I am buying towels and toilet paper and settling into my forever home. I am kind of disappointed that I had not reached a greater state of trust in the road ahead of me and that I allowed that creepy sneaky voice to pop in and rain on my parade. You know, the one that tells you to worry all the way home about getting a flat tire. I have finally come to the realization that when life is closest to perfection, I am in a state of observing it, witnessing and experiencing the events as they take place not having them confine me.
I now stand face to face with the future and realize I have absolutely no idea what it will bring, it is way too complex to understanding the orchestrated synchronicity of events that got me to today. So instead, I have chosen to see my life as a spectator sport and like my good friend Barbara Mayer (Author of Beyond Religion) reminds me, we are really only “pedestrians”. I share more about these realizations in my CD.
I am a spiritual warrior, yes and I am on the “path” to wherever spiritual people are going but I am done with the search for my life purpose because I have finally found it !!! So…..drum roll please…..my life purpose is……..I SHOWED UP.
Continuing to ask this question of myself was like wanting to know the purpose of being at a rock concert? The purpose is to experience it, hear, see and smell it. The truth is that I bought a ticket to earth, I screamed my way through the birth canal and took my first steps. I packed my book bag on the first day of school, I walked down the aisle to the altar and then had to spread my husband’s ashes to mention a few of the significant experiences I had, but these are all the ingredients that add up to purpose.
My ups and downs are necessary for growth and even though my thoughts can be like ants at a picnic, spoiling everything, they can be managed. This allows me to find a tidy existence and actually contribute to creating a pretty nice place to hang out while I am here. Yes, there will be pitfalls ahead but I will remember that expecting a life of perfection means I would have to leave earth, and I kinda like it around here. So, I will hit the power button on life’s remote control, sit back and watch it unfold from now on and the next time when I sit under the stars and ponder why I am here, I will just be satisfied with watching the show and not be tempted to fast forward, and spoil the ending.
Check out the Tree of Life Harmony CD
